Not the story.

I wonder what makes me keep going........ is it the hope or is it the need to be expressed ? I always believed it's the latter but the hope of her understanding is also there...but then wouldn't it hurt her or make her worried......I so wish that that does not happen, but I have removed references anyways.

Only thing I cant remove is the pain which now seems to be a bit of me now.. She gave me nothing..but at least this feeling she did give. Or maybe I just took it from her but still, she is the source of it... :) .

I cant believe ....still can't believe how she seems like the world even now. But she does. May the universe make her tread the path that is the best for her.

Paa ke rab kya karoon :) .

Speculation

From my knowledge of the female psyche, The female subconscious (when it comes to relationships) is governed by the primary human motive of producing the healthiest off-springs. It is sub-consciously drawn towards strength and power, since that has been the key to survival for as long as life has existed. Additionally, some are even attracted to intelligence.....looks are a newer phenomenon though. It is not that females did not have an appreciation for looks in the past, but it was looked at as a secondary male characteristic as men where the chosers and females were "suppposed" to please them.

Times changed, and the media began using the female body and the male facination towards it for selling products. The fashion caught on like wilfwire and the motive for maximising profits started to overrule any moral imperatives that might have existed. This caused a fundamental shift in the female mindset and they now look at themselves being the "chosers". However, subconsciously, they still like to be chosen....The mere fact that females love to dress up and love being complimented more than anything else clearly indicates that their desire for approval is overwhelming.

Despite the subconscious subservience, the conscious struggle against male dominance is stupid, simply since it amounts to fighting your own subconscious beliefs. Interestingly, the one I love could not care much less....probably the sad part is that she is a little too immature to take it easy (or maybe she has been "directed" not to care at all :( ).....anyways what matters is that she just went over the top and blew it....and what should not have been forgotten, seems to have been lost. :) .

You need to know this fellow before it gets over.

I would have appreciated everything, if only you knew me. You know only the tip of the person called Einstein. This person has been through times soft and tough....I have been tested with love and hatred....I won over those who hated me.....Its only that you can't fight those you love....You can only wait patiently till they finally decide to pay heed to you.

If only, ....If only you knew the person ...the person called Einstein .... I would not have bugged you...not for a moment even.