Let it go . . . . if it comes back it was yours . . . . . . . if it does not . . . . .

Consider this one.

The three most difficult tasks in life are neither physical feats not are they intellectual achievents. Rather they are moral acts :

1. To return love for hate.
2. To include the excluded.
3. To say, “I was wrong”.

I know some things after all.

If only we had a society where people were encouraged from their birth to be themselves rather than becoming something else, we would have a lot more happiness around. There is enough love in each of us, just that we are taught to not trust, to the extent where we are told to not trust.....not to call a spade a spade and not spread the love within us. I myself have been closed to the world around me....not anymore ....not anymore.....


However, I am convinced that such a society deserves punishment, It deserves to be disintegrated and reformed, and I shall endeavor to accomplish it in my lifetime, just so that humans in the future have better vision and appreciation of what deserves the same.

Just one quote.

“People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that's bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they're afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they're wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It's all in how you carry it. That's what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you're letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.” : Jim Morrison

Nightmares ?

Late night yesterday .... I was in the room alone...the room partner last night had been talking about seeing two old figures sitting at night in the room close to the refrigerator.....made me feel a little scared, so to get the feeling of not being alone, I slept with the television on. The TV channel was showing football...... I have blurry memories of dreaming about football somehow....I was probably inside a football stadium, watching some key game.... it is strange how I can't recall most of it. My sleep somehow got broken, and I was too lazy to turn the TV off, so I slept again just like that.

Then I had a nightmare. Somehow, in my dream, I was in the middle of the Atlantic ocean. I knew it was the Atlantic because I was on too familiar a ship, "The titanic". The view was enthralling....I somehow recalled with fondness in my dream itself, the first time when we bunked our class to watch the movie.

Suddenly I felt like the entire ship was sinking around me, but strangely, nobody was screaming. There was at this point, as I remember, a deafening sound of water rushing, and yet I felt nothing. No fear, no pain, no adrenaline rush....nothing . Amazingly, I could see nothing on the ship but one silhouette. The silhouette was unmistakable, although there was absolutely nothing I could see to be sure. It was as if magically, I just knew everything about it I felt it smile from inside the hood …it was a painful smile…an almost apologetic smile …………. I suddenly felt all the emotions rush into me as I became hopelessly scared and I just began gasping for breath. The heart was pounding as I tried to advance towards the figure....somehow as much as I tried, the floor of the ship would keep moving backwards or something, so that I effectively remained in the same position. I could not see what happened to that figure but I felt a sense of loss at letting it go. I somehow a sense of guilt at having allowed it to fall into the ocean...that somehow I was responsible. I felt a deep pain, a familiar feeling from not so long ago. It was as if something heavy loaded onto my chest, making breathing impossible.

I desperately and frantically sought to get to the place where the other figure was on the ship. It was as if it's survival meant everything to me now. But as nightmares have a nasty habit of making you feel helpless, so did this one. All of a sudden, the ship was gone ! there was no ship. The ocean was all around me. A giant circular wave roaring at great speed, taking me with it. I can not even closely reproduce that wave in my mind but the wave in the movie 2012 (which sweeps the "Ship" (USS J.F.Kennedy) ) was the closest that I can get.

The circular wave was all over me...the dark blue every where.....the night was so violent, yet there was no sound track in the dream at this point....I could hear nothing.... just the sound of silence.

I felt as if the waves would engulf me. Like nothing would ever be the same again. I felt like I would die. Somehow, I wanted to die for the guilt for letting that one person go away and suffer was too much.... and somehow I knew that this was the world that I had to live in forever... and this person was the only other person in this ship world. My world in the dream included just Just the ship and the silhouette figure ...not to mention the ocean and the sky with it's decorations.

I was overwhelmed with sentiments as It sunk in that even the silhouette was no longer to be seen. I started trying to swim across the stretch, and to find that person, but I do not even know how to swim, let alone saving someone's life. I just kept violently shaking my hands and legs, but somehow I could not make a move. I shouted, only to be responded with silence. I almost began to give up...feeling I would die without a purpose in the sea. The feeling of not being able to breathe made my terribly scared....and it was not the fear of death that caused the fear........

Then, suddenly, I woke up.


Reflecting on it makes me want to wake up again. But life is not so much of a dream.

Peace !

A thousand words.

Isn't life a huge parody ?

Every morning I wake up , 
I need you, I seek you
And along the path I , go on


Far across the distance, 
and spaces, between us
I just hope that the truth on you shall dawn.


Near, far ...wherever you are.
Once its there, the bond does; go on.
Its okay, if you're not so sure...
You're still here in my heart and,
My heart will go on and on.   (Till I die :P ) 


Love can touch us one time
And last for a lifetie,
and never go till, we're gone.


Love is now I love you,
One true time, I'll hold to.
In my life will always, go on,


Near, far.... wherever you are
Once its there, the bond does; go on.
I'm sure, my purpose is pure
and you're here in my heart and
My heart will go on, and; on.


Me amor; you deserved so much more.
May you have it all that you want
World may stay, not ever this way,
but you're safe in my heart 
And my heart will go on, and;on.

So much for a friendship

We tend to often find value, happiness and even purpose in others. When friends are made, they are not made out of choice but out of chance. The commitment is mutual to have a positive attitude to the other and to trust each other. The term "love" has become too "misused" and seems to mean just "romantic love" these days but friendship is love itself, and probably a less selfish form at that. Although all forms of human attachment including Love are probably illusory and may well be selfish at the very core , it is still the best and probably the least selfish form that exists.


It is interesting to see that in this world, fear beats the more benign sentiments fair and square.

Worthy Pursuits

In life, we all have our own sets of dreams and ambitions. We come up with our own set of rules withing which we play to get to those dreams. We seek our objectives with relentless motivation, however, sometimes our beliefs makes us look the other way when our dreams stare us in the face. Again the opposite is also often true. It is often the case that when we try to get hold of our dreams, the dream remains elusive. I could just have said that some things are simply not meant to be. However, being both a thinking and a feeling person, I know that the world is not so important. Neither myself nor anyone else really matters. think on the earth scale and our lives are so insignificant ! If things are so insignificant and nothing is worth anything .....why can't people understand that bonds, if any; must be cut down. Inhibitions must be lost and freedom must be sought.

Freedom from thought control of all sorts, including the conventional media, the social expectations and from ignorance. Ignorance causes control of one's own ego on one's own actions. Enlightenment, (even if merely intellectual and not spiritual) can liberate. It can help one see the truth in life. It can help one realize the truth .


Fears, if any must be forgotten.

Pains if any must be healed.


And feelings (of oneself and others) must be understood, seen for what they are and appreciated.

The question is: "Would that make the world a better place to live ? " .